Emmy Brunner
CEO The Recover Clinic/ Entrepreneur/ Psychotherapist/ Empowerment Coach/ Author
Where were you raised? Has the landscape of that place influenced your work in any way?
I was moved around a lot as a young person and shunted from a liberal and vibrant city environment to a conservative, rural space. It was a full-on blow to the system and I felt totally shell shocked by the racism and narrow mindedness that I encountered. I’d been raised to see the world differently and this idea of ‘them and us’ was totally alien to me. I’ve never forgotten this experience and it’s driven me to foster a sense of ‘togetherness’ within the communities that I lead. We’re so driven societally to view the world as a fragmented place but really, I think we’re so similar in our core wants and needs.
How do you re-charge your creative battery?
I try to focus on letting go, being in nature and being present as much as I can. I have two daughters and they are a real creative life force for me…my time is spent with them song writing, decorating each others faces, creating sculptures and building dens. I’m so grateful to my children for reminding me to play. I find that men stay connected to ‘play’ so much better than women do and I crave that interaction with my girlfriends and seek it out whenever I can.
What book are you reading?
I’ve just finished reading The Midnight Library by Matt Haig. He quietly offers a sort of modern day philiosophy on life and I love finding books that I think will inspire by clients or will provide a bridge to hope. This was one of those. I also read Mariah Carey’s autobiography “The Meaning of Mariah Carey’…it was so unexpectedly moving and I loved it.
What was the last thing that you fell in love with?
When I was pregnant with my second daughter, my eldest daughter Dixie was nervous that things would be different and that I might not love her the same way; I told her that I have a huge heart and am capable of an infinite amount of love, and it’s true. I find it incredibly easy to fall in love with people and places but people are my greatest loves. I find it very easy to emphathise and connect with others and I love to see the light in people. That always makes me feel joyful and makes my heart brim over.
What do you love most about yourself?
I’m very loving and giving to my family and friends but I’m also willing to be vulnerable to people when I know it will help them on their own healing journies. Boundaries were a real challenge for me growing up and so knowing when to be kind but also to set boundaries around my own wants and needs has been a skill that’s taken some honing.
What do you think is the most important quality in a human?
Kindness is a big one for me. Kindness I feel is such an underated virtue but I feel it’s one of the most valuable attributes and allows us to tolerate difference without judgement. My husband is so unwaveringly kind to people, he has time for everyone and has absolutely no agenda. I’ve not often met people like that…willing to give space and time to another, simply because they are human. It moves me often and inspires me to be better.
Do you have a spiritual practice?
My spiritual practice was established more as a survival strategy than anything else. In the early days I read, meditated and prayed because I needed to survive. I was unwell, traumatised and lost and I was looking for something, anything to anchor to. With persistence and bloody mindedness something changed…my energy changed and calmed. My defences softened and I was able to let love into my life. I spent so long looking outside of myself for answers but in the end, I came to realise that I already had everything that I needed. I love talking about spirituality today because I relate so much to the sceptics, I realise that we’re all just a bit afraid really and sometimes we just need someone to sit in the darkness with us, without trying to drag us toward the light.
Who are your role models?
As a young woman I was incredibly inspired by American writers such as Alice Walker and Maya Angelou. I was so lost in my own volatile and sad world and the women that I grew up around had no voices, even in English literature there was only implied rebellion. But these were women who had voices, they literally shone and were so so brave. They gave me hope, and I used to think…’well if they can do it with all the adversity they face, then so can I’.
If you could change one thing about our world, what would it be? Is there a individual or an organization doing work in this area that you want us to know about?
I would implement an entirely different approach to treating mental unwellness. In my view mental health treatment is still very archaic and ultimately, not very successful. It focuses on symptom resolution without understanding that people need to heal from their core. We patholigise normal human responses to trauma and I think that the whole system needs to be revolutionaised. There are a few voices out there who I feel are aligned with my own views…one is Bessel Van Der Kolk MD who has spent much of his career researching strategies for treating trauma. His book The Body Keeps The Score’ is pretty incredible.
Before I die I want to…
Help as many as people as possible to heal. I found the first 25 years of my life pretty painful but I also gained tremendous insight into how to live in light with an open heart…I like to share those learnings with others in pain through my work.
All images courtesy of Emmy Brunner
